Nothing To Do

After reading this article, I am left pondering. Personally, I thought about my answers to the questions posed in the article.

• What gender would you prefer your firstborn child to be (or did you hope for if you already have a child)?

I would prefer my firstborn child to be male

•  If you were to have (or do have) more than one child, would you prefer the majority to be male or female?

I have no preference for a majority of male or female children

• If you were to have only one child, what gender would you prefer it to be?

I would not have a preference

So, with that information, I pondered. Clearly, I fall outside the norm set by this study. The only question I care at all about is the first one, and since I am female, my preference for a male first-born (if I have more than one child) is the opposite of what is “supposed to” happen. I suppose I should explain that preference. I think, at the heart of it, is my own personal history. I was the second of 3 children, and I had an older brother. This significantly shaped how I grew up as a girl. I was not pink or scared of bugs and reptiles because my brother would have lost some respect for me if I was. I cared very little, if at all, about my hair, make-up, clothes, shoes, and other “girly” things. Honestly, though, this probably had as much to do with my mother as with my brother. I find that this experience makes me feel balanced and well-adjusted. So, that’s part of why I would want my second child to have an older brother. I also have experienced male firstborns developing more nurturing characteristics than other men. Again, that’s just my personal experience and in no way reflects any actual knowledge of such statistics. There are probably other factors in my preference for a male firstborn, but that’s what’s coming to mind. 

Mostly, my thoughts come from a sibling perspective, rather than a parenting perspective. I think that I would have equal joys and challenges from male or female children. I do not think one would be easier or harder than another. I do not think I would have an easier or harder time relating to one or the other. In all my teaching/tutoring/childcare experience, I have had difficulties and successes with both. I tell anyone who cares to hear that I just do not work well with 8-year-old boys or 13-year-old girls. Perhaps I just have a “masculine” mindset. There are lots of “masculine” attributes that I exhibit, even as a female. I hate asking for directions, and would rather just study the map. I care very little about my appearance. I prefer my clothes to fit loosely than fitted. I have no memory for dates. I am more often blunt than “coy” or whatever. It is what it is. I personally don’t see myself as masculine, I don’t identify as masculine or male. Regardless, these are my thoughts on the matter.